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Friday, October 1, 2010

PPISMP Sem 1 PJ test =D

=prakata=
okay, now I am going to record down what had been done this whole tiring week.
On Monday, after a tiring practise of our gym as usual, we took bus and went to BP mall to buy tracksuits and make-up thingy~ Of course, a great dinner could not be missed out =P hence, here we are!
SUSHI KING ^^

the meal I ordered, RM14.90, it's yummy! x)

shi ying and I =)

not to forget, my most 'YENG' pko, sin pin

suan suan, ah quek, ah sing ^^

hee hee, back to me again xP
due to the gym performance, I am wearing contact lens!
do I look better without my spec? LoL

My hand turned like this - hei1 qing1 due to over practise bola tampar =(
no pain no gain, finally the ball can pass the net, hopefully it would pass during my GERKO test too =D

=During the test (30/9/2010)=
After 1 month practising, finally the final day which had been waited for so long reached! Lotsa different feelings mixed up in the core of my heart - happy, nervous, unbelievable, scare and so on. My friends and I woke up at 4.30 AM that morning just to tidy up ourselves - wearing make-ups and comb hair~ Kinda early huh? Aiks, it was tiring and I was having insufficient sleep Z.z
That was not my first time wearing make up, but it was my first time helping people make up. Guys in our group became the white rat. HA! This is what we called sacrifising due to art..Soon, all of us were ready and we turned out like this......
no doubt, our face became like this, with a 'K' and a crown on it (K^^)
me, ngoh, fang lee, wan ting, pei wen
my ah mate - han yin and i n_n


girls from Muar ^0^
Dont know what Lnn Lau doing behind...@@

Lastly, MY GROUP MEMBERS!! thank for the co-operation during the practise and test! xD
WE'RE THE BEST, THE WINNER, THE CHAMPION!
(from back left: pei wen, me, shi ying, ah quek, wan ting, ah sing, suan suan)
(from front left: jiong chee, zhen cong, shin phing, huai jun, lnn lau)

during the break in the middle of the test.

ME with make up, without spec. looked different =X

ME with spec, without make up. normal =)
=EXTRA=
-From this test, we see people's true colours, who got the potential to be the leader and who are the followers (of course I am the one, haiz~). Who are the one even cant follow well...
-We learnt to be co-operate and tolerance. Nobody is perfect. We start from 0 and slowly a complete 10 minutes show was created by 12 people brains. We learnt to take and give all the steps. The whole process is cool and a memorable one! I admit I hate it in the beginning but after that I enjoy it very much though it is lame and suffering sometime. :)
-Not to deny it, our friendship improved. I coverse with guys better and to girls closerr. For yee ching and ah leong, from friends to couple! Woah, that's cool, babe~
-We see people bad attitude. Do anything immoral and illegal just to achieve the final destination. No pain no gain, I truly believe it. But some people can just copy our product and modify into THEIR product. So sad but true. It is annoying! Really want to scold those 'cats' a four-letter-word and show them the international language!! Screw it ><### Maybe next time we should apply our own brand to avoid copying.
'Boo sama dia,BOOOOOOO~' miao miao......
=PJ kecergasan test and running test (1/10/2010)=
Second day and last day for our PE test. I tried my best in pumping but kick the lecturer's ass, he deducted my marks!! I did my pumping with accurate actions 30 times until my hands trembling. How could he just cut the 30 and changed my marks to 25??!! HATE IT @@#
Out of 6 activites we had to carry out, which carry 30 marks, I merely gain a 16 marks only. Poor girl ~.~
But.......
The most thing that disappoint me was my running test. I am able to run 2.4KM. I managed to run by my own determination before for dunno how many times already but not today. I lost the determination that I used to have. I stopped on the way and continued it with brisk walk. KNS! I didnt know what had happened to me. My friends shocked when they saw I was walking. For them, I am quite a good runner, at least I could run. But this morning, I was so poor. I hate myself. I felt disappointed on myself. I felt sorry to myself, my classmates, my taekwondo miss and my fellow friends. Why I just couldnt force myself to finish it? What for I am regreting now? haizzz~
running under mercilessly October sun. It was 11.30 AM that time!!My gosh =O

It is cool! I had finally finished all the PJ test. And now only GERKO test left.
I heard that highest and second highest marks of gymnastic test all went to BC2!!! woohoo! BC2 is the best! And our group get the highest! Hopefully the news our seniors told us is accurate. -/\-
Having seriously headache now~ poor me, the strong penetration of damn 11.30AM ultraviolet and sunshine made me like this. Feel like vomit and very uncomfortable now. ="(
Tomorrow can see all of my dears~ YAhooo! x)
Wanna have a good night rest, nitez and ciao~
Refer to 'my life in maktab I' in fb for more photos yea ^^
muaksss~ *0*

yeeeee~ HA!

CHEERS~!!!
nightmare-part 1 had finally ended!
successful and flawless gym performance had been done.
loud cheers and applause had been heard ^^V
juicy photos will be uploaded soon after I back home =)
ps:
babe"s", I am going back this week! meet u guys soon!
mua muakss ^0^

Sunday, September 26, 2010

I feel HAPPY

We're friends again.
I AM HAPPY =)))
no more quarel due to small things kay?
because it hurts.
I appreciate and heart you, always...

Saturday, September 25, 2010

it is all about sport test =X

GYM makes my life suffering because I have to practise for my coming PE gym test after school everyday. It is torturing to practise in the gym room because it is a place hot like sauna room =X
It makes me sweat a lots and smelly to the MAX >.< size="1">though some of them sweat esp guys... =PHopefully everything will be all right during the test! -/\-

Next week I gonna have my PE kecergasan test (2.4KM, sit up, pumping, jumping, running ulang-alik) and PE gym test and GERKO bola tampar test (cervis, setting, digging, smatch..) ~.~
OMGosh =O
It gonna be a terribly-super-tiring-and-toturing week for me!!!
I scare GERKO test the most!!! My bola tampar skills suck!! And I really worry I fail it and kena buang from maktab..hoping for miracles so that I am able to pass GERKO test with at least C (I want B+ so that I can get sijil cemerlang)
I scare PE kecergasan test too as I couldnt do sit up well without people holding my legs. And also my 2.4KM. alamak!
I scare PE gym test too! Scare I forget the steps and accidents happen. *touchwood*
I scare and feel so nervous about every tests. Hopefully everything will be smoothly carry out =)

gym practise session, tiring!!


having our dinner with my dearest group members at 9PM after practise
gym practise cruelly made my knees becoming like this TT TT
with my new class clothes!! It is awesome! x)


Wednesday, September 22, 2010

IT class again~

IT class again and I'm typing my post secretly without teacher knowing , ngek*3.
So sleepy and boring learning microsoft excel Z.z my nap couldnt satisfy me!!

somehow,
HAPPY MOONCAKE FESTIVAL!! boys and girls xDD
this is my first time celebrating this festival with friends and I'm looking forward the celebrating party tonight. Hopefully I can have a memorable and great night =)
I hope I could spend this festival with all my dear friends and kmpp friends too! It sure would be a extremely GREAT party if they were all here ="(
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p/s: tried my best to mix with people now, become more talkative and playful. no more scary and nervousity when talking to guys and 'yam chong'. Sometimes, having fun with them is quite special experience too. Maybe this is their way to get close and mix well with people kot~
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pp/s: Yesterday night was a great one too! We had finally finish arranging steps for gym test. Hopefully video of my group performances would be posted up here after my pj test next week. But then, we all trapped inside gym because of it suddenly rained cats and dogs. So, we shared LOVE stories among classmates in gym under thunders and heavy rain. We had our dinner in a dark dark gym room, talking and laughing. I found that this can improve our friendship. Hope that I can well mix with everybody =)
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ppp/s: also yesterday night, I was molested by 'bc 2 yam chong' in their room. Scare me =X
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lol, why so many 'ps' ?? Aku pun tak tau =="" CIAO~

Monday, September 20, 2010

5 mins break

I am in IT class now..and I'm honoured a 5 mins break ^^V

I slept 3sth sth yesterday due to complete chinese assignments! damn it! f**king tough task!

Yesterday night, or to be exactly is early of this morning, I had been annoyed by my friend! I really fed up and felt so reluctant to talk to her. My face turned so smelly, I know it well. I know my pattern, sometime I can be too straight and I dont even scare to hurt people. I just want them to know I 'boi song' with them. Since I leaving home, I had changed alot already. If the same situation happened in my secondary school, I sure I will scold her. But I really try my best to calm down my anger ady. I just keep quiet and slowly trying to finish my work as much as possible. I hope sb show her automatic but well, I am disappointed again. Sad,huh?

Since sb is challenging my patient and my 'kindness', I think nobody is going to stand ady. I am not wrong and why should I?

I had a 'nice talk' to her, sweetly~ omgosh! Now only realised sometime I am such a nice person, yuck =P I said 'excuse me, do you know what group work means? Group work is a teamwork by all members and not done by only one person in a group. Well, we have both agree that I will complete for chinese assignment and you will be doing physical education assignment, I dont mind, I really dont mind I'm doing more for this assignment but have you complete your PE assignment? and also moral assignment?' 'NO~" is what I heard ==""

If in this situation, should I be angry?...or would you be angry? We both have the same period of holidays--2 weeks time and what are you doing? I am human being and you are too, both homo sapiens isnt it? and why I can at least finish my part and you cant? I dont mind you didnt help but I am angry with your attitude and not even finish your work! ><#####
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OS in heart......
devil: STOP IT! start from today, if people dont want to do their work, thats it! I do it myself due to my own benefit. I dont care. I am lazy to care. If I cant tahan, only I nag and hope to see some changes, and if it doesnt change to a better way, I curse. LOL, I wont curse anybody because it just makes me dosa. What for I doing this due to silly person? Sometime, I just think that I should be more cruel, no more tolerance and patient since they are not being appreciated by people nowadays. Dont be surprise if the next time you see me, only a pair of cruel eyes and a fake smile shown.
angel: I still dont think you'll have a great change since you're always too consider about others' feelings...

Sunday, September 19, 2010

coming to an end n start soon

the expected 2 weeks holidays finally come to an end =(
I back to my dorm safely, clean my room smoothly and now I own a clean little space again :)
2 weeks time can be really FAAAAAST! and I end up with nothing..
with uncompleted assignmentS and just few pieces of photo only..quite disappointed actually..but girl, you should learn to be contented and thankful of what you get, so smile plzzz ^^
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I got more missions to be done!
I gotta learn to be more sociable and no more shy =X
I gonna make my life a great one, no more plain life, hopefully I can ^^V
so here I come, 20/9/10--> START SCHOOLING>>>YEEPEE xP
it gonna be a busy week!!! A_R_G_H! XO
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P/S: NOW I'm looking forward my year end holiday, hope my dreams come true! visitpenangnkmppwithyouguys and singapore =D
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pp/s: I love the note I shared in fb.Sorry again for escaping last time. If I were in that situation again, I dont think I'll do the same silly thing because I know it hurts. But I know it's too late for me to tell you that I..ehem.... I promised you that I'll let go the past and I really do, just sometime I'll still think of you guys. How about you? How are you? my friend =)

Saturday, September 18, 2010

happy and sad and homesick TT TT

miss you guys, my ex-F4 members..if i were inside =(

since yesterday, my fb homepage had been flooded by the photo of jamuan 1 Malaysia in KMPP, lols
yes, I feel happy to see all of you again =)
no, I feel sad to see all of you together and I'm alone =(
time flies, things changed!
I personally think that everybody had changed, getting older (or I should say becoming more mature), friendship getting closer, relationship with lecturers better.
How much I feel happy yet jealous? +.+
How much I wish I could be with you all~
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tomorrow I gonna say goodbye to my holidays and back to maktab again..I feel so sad that I have to face assignments, gym practices and the most important thing is I couldnt meet u guys~ BADLY MISS F4P3 and wen wen!!!aiks...
badly miss thc,10,II,yy,vf,miki,sasa,mummy,kaili,farn,pek,kid,tbq,jy,vic...
badly miss Muar and start to homesick dy..
I DONT WANT TO GO BACK IPTHO!! TT TT
can I?

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p/s: so happy that I found my lecturer's fb yesterday and she still remembers me. I'll study hard and be like you one day, miss Ong..be a good educator ^^
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pp/s: maybe you guys might forget me one day, but I SWEAR I am not going to forget you all, NEVER!!
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ppp/s:时间会冲淡一切,但它不会冲淡我对你们的思念
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pppp/s:hopefully I'm able to visit kmpp again. hopefully ppl welcome n looking forward my appearance. if not it hurts. -/\-

Friday, September 17, 2010

突然这么觉得。。。

你变得真的好陌生
我不敢相信你是我认识这么多年的你
我无法想象我们曾经是那么地好
现在的你眼神如此冰冷
有好几次,我好想去敲刚上线的你,像以前那样
然而我止步了
我不敢
不敢再去打扰你
我没有立场
我真得很希望我们还是以前的关系--好朋友
很希望你还来约我去喝茶
我会当我们之间什么事都发生过
心软的我可以
忘记你的侮辱
忘记你的伤害
然而这两天
你的涂鸦墙让我心碎了
或许你真得很痛恨我吧?我这个与你不同世界的人类
你是高尚的美女医生;我只是个小老师
当我看到你跟现在的朋友那么好
我的心很酸,是吃醋么?是吧~
想到以前你会主动挽着我的手走在大街上
我们约好要做一辈子的好姐妹的
一切已随风飞逝
我真得很爱你这个朋友,很珍惜我们之间的相遇
你呢?
我很恨!如果当初我更努力点,跟你一样拿到JPA,我们会不会还是好朋友?
很多时候,我把这当成自己的错了
我真得很想哭
当我发现你已经意图明显地与我分割
是否你觉得我高攀不上你?
是否你觉得跟我做朋友弄脏了你纯洁的羽毛?
也许有一天
我们还会在路上遇见
那时
我们会打招呼么?会微笑么?
也许我们只会擦肩而过
我想,
人生最大的悲哀莫过于此吧~
ps:我真得很想很想很想念你。。。
pps:恶魔说:人家都这样对你了,你为什么还要留念?天使说:我做不到因为这样就讨厌她
ppps: TT TT

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

just a short second post for today..HAPPY ^^

Finish another 10 pieces of 'chun lian' tonight~
Another year is coming. Maybe you'll think it is just too early to prepare this but my calligraphy teacher wanna collect 10000++ 'chun lian' each year. So, we gonna start early too =)
Sometime I do feel lazy to write you know,but it is kind of 'tugasan' that I have to carry out every year for donation. It is a good deed. I dont have so much money to donate for those people who are having kidney failure and going for dialysis but I can work for them. No forcing, but I'm willing to do so. There is no point helping people under forcing and stress, isnt it? LOLS...I feel great and contented after writing 10 pieces each day. (10*RM3=RM30) That means I am gaining RM30 for them each day x)
SO, I feel happy now and hopefully I am able to finish 300 pieces of it this year. And perhaps MORE..!!
another 280 pieces to go, GAMBATEH!! ^^V

oomg! it makes my palm becomes like this and everything I touched turn RED~ =O
somehow,no pain no gain...hehe =P

bye,earthlings~

she gonna kill me~ anyway,happy sweet 18 girl ^.^

It had been 6 years we known each other. I know it aint long~but, We shared a lot and played a lot throughout this 6 years. We experienced happiness, sadness, exam fever and we even experienced 'cold war' throughout this 6 years. And now, we're still best friends though we had been apart...miss the days we chit-chatting together~argh!badly miss ~.~

Lee Yi Ling (short form,10 xP), sincerely wish you HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! hope that you're always that happy and crazy and we're friends forever!!! xD
the cute girl ^.^ 10 and THC ^^V

Take 1: I can only laugh so loud when you all are by my side without minding any image~

Take 2: A successful one =) say CHEESE^^!

NickName COMPANY FOREVER~ =P
nobody would ever know our little secret. hopefully the 'cartoon news' could be our little joke even after 10 years and more...LOVE YOU MEMBERS,muaksss!
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-end of a happy day-perhaps more are coming soon-
ps: no doubt! I'm wearing the physics @ matricity clothes if you could realise it...xP

Monday, September 13, 2010

品读庄子 放飞心灵

庄子是战国时期伟大的思想家。他宣扬道家思想并主张自然无为,此思想主张更是贯穿了他大部分的散文著作。



以我的浅见,作者在《逍遥游》的开头时引用了“鲲”与“鹏”是为了给读者一个更为宽广的想象空间。大鱼在水中虽然也可说是自由自在、无忧无虑,但水里的阻力较大,鲲的庞大虽然令人觉得自在但其庞大的身躯在水中的行动并不自在,因此庄子便让它跳脱水的束缚,化为了鹏,能在天空中翱翔。“风之积也不厚,则其负大翼也无力”,当我们觉得鹏应该能展翅高飞在蔚蓝的天空中的时候,它巨大的体型又给它带来了不便,因为它需要借助更强大的风力才能飞翔在青天。在庄子的另一部著作《秋水。濠墚之辩》中也说了:“子非鱼,安知鱼之乐?” 现实生活中,人们往往只看见一个人外形上的转变却忽略了他内心上是否得到真正的自由和快乐,这错不在人,而是我们并不是主人公又如何能读透他人的思维和想法呢?在这个日新月异的21世纪,人们非常地渴望自由。呱呱坠地的婴儿渴望长大因为能行走;求学的莘莘学子渴望长大因为能抛开考试压力,大人就像鲲与鹏一样被认为是有许多自由的然而大人也面对着烦恼,如:没有宽旷的职场让他们发挥所长。人们总是不满足于自己身处的环境,羡慕别人更安逸自由的生活才会给自己的心灵带来束缚。其实我们并不了解他们也有自己的烦恼。很多时候我们只要放开心胸,享受自己身在的环境而不是一味地追求他人所拥有的及效仿他人的生活方式,不再执著地给予自己烦恼,我们就会像鲲甩掉湿淋淋的水分化身为鹏飞腾空中,获得更大的心灵自由,真正地放飞心灵达到逍遥的境界。



日前曾在报章上读到某学生为了考试成绩不理想而认为自己无用并想不开、寻短见,自毁了美好和充满创造力的人生。在分析庄子的作品时发现了庄子对“有用”及“无用”的看法。他认为东西之所以有用是因为设在了适当的地方让它发挥其所长。他认为一棵大树虽不能用以当作圆规或角尺,但它却因为如此逃过了被砍伐的命运,它站在路旁可供路人乘凉,那也未必不是件好事。正所谓天生我才必有用,凡事都有其有用之处,只是有用无用的标准是主观的,我觉得其差别就仅仅在于看人是否会用。例如轮椅对于残障人士或行动不便的老人是非常有用的然而对于四肢健全的人也就只是起了画蛇添足的作用。有时想想,哪怕只是将地上的纸巾拾起也是对美化环境出一份绵力,是有用的作为啊。故此,我们不应该看不起自己,相反地应该努力地做好自己当个有用的人,满足的心灵就能造就自由逍遥的人生!



此外,在这个功利主义的新时代,人们常常被眼前的利润和金钱蒙蔽了双眼,认为只有富裕的生活才能达到自由。但遗憾的是,他们往往失去了亲情和快乐。因此,我非常赞同庄子所认为的道德修养高尚的“至人”能够达到忘我的境界,精神世界完全超脱物外的“神人”心目中没有功名和事业,思想修养臻于完美的“圣人”从不去追求名誉和地位。当尧欲将天下让给许由时,许由拒绝了因为他认为“名”是“实”所派生出来的次要东西,他并不在意。这就是达到了无所待,逍遥的境界。这也令我想起了曾在某书读过的文章,即飞翔是每个人想要的但殊不知飞的首要条件是够轻,倘若一个人每天都在考虑鸡毛蒜皮的琐事或心系赚钱之道的话,那试问每天顶着重达千斤的脑袋,心有所忧,又如何能够飞得起来呢?名利乃过眼云烟,所以只有不刻意追求和贪图名与利,我们才会心无挂碍,开心自在地过生活,达到真正的“圣人”般的逍遥!



品读了庄子的作品,我终于明白为何早在几年前书法老师就不时要我阅读庄子的作品,原来那是为了要我放松心情,才能将以机械化的写法抛开。果然,我学会了放下,不再执著不属于自己的东西。我相信只有放下,我才能更珍惜现在拥有的,活得更开心!让我们都释怀,放飞昨日烦躁不安的心境,拥抱自由、潇洒、逍遥的明天吧!

Sunday, September 12, 2010

书法课~

很久没给自己的作品拍照PO上来了~
今天又是星期天,又有书法课。
很开心哦~
好久没给老师称赞了。。
“纯朴”是老师的comment~他说他也写不出这样天然的感觉~字如其人,所以我是个单纯的人~是吧?=P
可是单纯和纯朴的个性好么?就我而言,太天真的我容易被骗,容易受伤害吧~ 好坏就见仁见智了~^^

临习于右任草书:
是看了庄子的感悟才能放松地写吧~进步-ing x)

好大王碑~这是最近比较有感觉的一张~^^

以下是某新加坡大书法家的草书作品,写得龙飞凤舞,看了令人有心旷神怡的感觉~
学习目标!!
ps:
thank jasmin for giving me 50% of ur happiness, i am quite ok this 2 days le..
though sheding tears yesterday while reading those letters again, but is tears due to happy memories, but not emo-ing~
later gonna hangout limteh again... xD
wonder why my friends jio me at 10sth pm everytime, it is so tiring but it is worth! LOLS
so,
CIAO~ n_n

随意打打

看到了他们的对话
好伤感
看来我似乎已经被遗忘了
我已经不是他们的一员了
可是我也真得很想参进去啊
可是为什么我总显得那么突兀?
不是说看了庄子要学会放手么?
为什么还执著?

傻孩子,
人家在开心
你伤心个什么劲呀?
如果不能遗忘
就请你把它埋起来
不要再被发现了

Friday, September 10, 2010

the last 2 days were a great one! i met my primary school and secondary school friends who i had not met for ages~ we talked alot about the recent life and 3-4 hours can be passed so fast!=O i really hope for another and more gatherings between us... it'll definitely turn my bored day a nice and memorable one..only be with you all, i feel i'm not alone and wont think so much and wont be so frustrated =)
oh ya, i went to Carbana last night! this is my first time clubbing and to be honest, i DONT LIKE it =X the place was fulled of the smell of cigarette. i felt very scary and uncomfortable when i was there. The place was so dark and the people there looked so 'complicated'. And, finally i saw my primary school friend smoking..i should ask him to stop this bad habit due to his health.. Also,I dont know why i could talk and play with my primary school friends so naturally, talk so loud and show my sampat-ness in front of them without care of any rational image..lols..i always feel so hard and embarass to talk much with guys but with them i feel perfectly ok, without minding the distance too. perhaps this is because we grow up together and our relationship are just like brothers and sisters, or i should say buddies as they never treat me as girl,LOL.
i had badly insomniac last night too, after clubbing. omg, i finished reading 'the journey to west' until chapter 35 as required to be read for semester 1 and finally slept at 4AM! i'm having a bad mood now =(
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ps: i guess you might dislike me since then, get fed up with my attitude and maybe lazy to bother me or friend with me anymore. I just hope you know why i'll be so emo. Whatever,care or not also nvm now. I just want to apologize to you for being over concern for sth i shouldnt bother and for the wrong assumption..If you could read this post, i apologize.....
SORRY!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

YO! gathering~ =D

I'LL BE GOING BACK TO MUAR SOON
swt,this is not I'm going to herald...perhaps this is from my fellows friends from kmpp,the jail..
well,
I should tell you~
I'LL MEET MY DEAREST FRIENDS SOON!!!
put your hands up! cheer for it~ yeah! xDDD
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N,he wont be on9 this few days i think~ bluek xP

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

幸福


she is wondering what's happiness?



幸福
幸福是
回到家里,躺在温暖的床上,抱着臭臭的抱抱发呆
幸福是
吃到home-cooked food,没有什么调味,只有淡淡幸福的香味
幸福是
对这家人发牢骚,带着撒娇的声音
幸福是
被家人和朋友当作小孩子般疼爱,永远当个小妹妹
幸福是
跟朋友一起聊心事,一起说八卦,一起发神经,不需要顾形象的小声讲,大声笑
幸福是
跟朋友一起熬夜读书,又一起发简讯鼓励着要睡着的对方,感觉世界上我们不是自己孤单地读着书,起码还有她的陪伴
幸福是
考到好成绩,全班羡慕又嫉妒地看着你的眼神,那种被肯定的荣耀感
幸福是
写的字被书法老师肯定,在全国赛中获奖,甚至被推荐参与国际大展
幸福是
阿公的;“乖”和离家时,家人的那句:“别哭,宝贝~”
幸福是
第一次吃自己煮的火锅,第一次穿上自己洗又香香的衣服
幸福是
朋友把我当好姐妹,把心事告诉我的时候
幸福是
知道世界上有人喜欢你的时候,那种很甜很甜又要装作不知道的时候
幸福是
当你有事时,大家第一时间来帮助你
幸福是
你开心时有人陪你开心,伤心时有人陪你哭
幸福是
有人在你无助的时候,用温暖的手紧握着你,那种被呵护着的感觉
幸福是
听到简单的三个字
幸福是
知道自己的存在很重要,当你不见时,大家的一句:“我想你,你好么?”
幸福是
离自己儿时梦想更进一步

becoming a teacher, see? i got my own name tag ^^


幸福
幸福没有真正的定义
幸福可以很简单到三个字就能满足,也可以很复杂到10个A才能满足
然而很多生活上渺小但幸福的小事都被当作不重要或理所当然,直到失去后才深感惋惜
过了就过了
家里的老人会逝去
一起读书的姐妹会失去
曾经的承诺会删去
等你想在拥抱他们的时候,没有人还会在那儿等着你
时间过了,心也会变的

我曾有过好多好多幸福
真得很庆幸
每次想起嘴角就会不自觉上扬
然而因为自己的不珍惜也失去了很多很多
长得越大,身边的假象越多
每天带着面具面对人群,我累了
就是这些幸福的因子,我才觉得没白活,为了爱我的你们,我才愿意向前进
一段失败的友情我已经伤得很深了,曾经想过是不是自己做人的失败
我累了
我好像抱抱你们,我好像回到过去~

我会珍惜现在自己拥有的,好的坏的所有的
人就是要学会珍惜
珍惜家人;珍惜所有朋友
我爱你们。我想你们
muacksss <3

with love, JC...

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

happy birthday, malaysia! =)

hari kemerdekaan = holiday
cheers for it!! xDD

quite emo as i feel i am being neglected by friends again...
i just couldnt join them, though i had really tried my best.
sad for it =X

no mood and lazy to talk, dunno why...
just feel so lazy, AIKS!

first time forget to bring me keys when i went out from my room
and my roomate was not in!OMG!!!
luckily she brought the keys out together,if not,we're going to sleep on corridor tonight =S
i waited patiently for her to come back from gym..
thanks honey =)
i think you're the BEST roomate
though sometime we may have different opinions and living styles~
but so far we havent quarel yet o! *touchwood*
and we're not going to have it ^^V

today blur blur de...@@
going to sleep ady..nitez^^ muacksss~

Sunday, August 29, 2010

hurt =X

when i wake up this morning,i thought i was having a nightmare yesterday
but after a while, i can confirm that that is a TRUTH! a CRUEL truth in my life
i NEVER think of i'll stop my friendship with her so easily.
NOW only i realise no friend can be trusted and nobody are worth to be trust. When u trust someone, u'll expect higher, and u'll get hurt =(
she is my best friend and best sister (if u could read this, dont puke and laugh at me like him, bcz i TRULY treat u as my sister),we experienced many things, facing exam fever together, studying together and encouraging each other. Those memories brighten and enriched my schooling life because as i know,no matter how tough is the task,we'll be facing it together. We cried together when exam suck! we laughed together when getting flying-colours-result! we pakat to burn the midnight oil together in the raya holidays before the F4 year end exam.we even called each other to make the final revision at 1sth pm before the paper of Chemistry. Do you still remember it?
I know maybe if u see this post,u'll feel i m so childish and silly,writing all those past memories and live in past. But, u know i m also childish.
I really hurt and cried my heart out after that call =X
i really GET HURT when u said i'm fake! when you said you never trust me! when you said we're having different gang of friends and different lifestyle now! when you said since you realised we talked bad about you, you already dont think we're your friends.
At first i dont know how to say let the relationship end,i feel reluctant to say and i DO HOPE you can say sth that calm me down, tell me we can still be good sista' although i guess it ll be a rare chance. BUT i never think of you will say such CRUEL thing =X
IT HURTS!

i know you are not worth for me to cry for you ady
you will never understand me as you used to do.
no matter you admit it onot, what i could say is you had changed TOTALLY =(
thanks for bringing me a lot of best memories and i wouldnt get such good result without your help and encouraging! =)
what i hope now is you can study hard and fulfill your ambition!

I LOVE YOU,WY JIE JIE~

Friday, August 27, 2010

阿公,我爱你

阿公我爱你~
你离开我已经一年半了。
你还好么?
有时我担心,我害怕,对你的印象会越来越模糊~
有时我真的觉得我已经习惯没有你的日子~
可是你重视会不经意地提醒我,你曾经在我生命中留下的痕迹。

阿公,我爱你~
每次我换新的读书环境你都回来看我,我都感觉得到~
在KMPP时你也到我房间来看我,虽然很模糊,但我知道你来了~

今天mummy说你给了我一个铜板~
我很惊讶!=O
原来很多东西都是冥冥之中的~法会上,师父丢铜板的时候,铜板滚到了二姑身边,那是阿公给我的铜板!
听着,我就哭了~
我真的好想念阿公~
想到你之前跟我说的每句话,我们谈话的内容是那么的少,我好后悔!我们应该聊更多的,聊你来南洋的故事,聊你的生平,可是我却没有过~甚至还一直埋怨你不喜欢我,重男轻女,只疼弟弟~TT TT
所以你每次切梨给我吃,问我吃饱没,我总会觉得特别窝心因为你有发现我的存在~
还有你唯一一次称赞我‘乖’,我会永远记得!
你那简单的一个字,肯定了我,我开心了好久~直到现在想起还是会露出微笑=)
虽然我每次答应你会乖乖的,不再惹长辈生气都没做到,对不起~希望你可以继续保佑我
我知道你会的!
因为你一定知道我对你的爱藏在不言中,我相信我现在心想什么你都会明白~

阿公我爱你!!
我会当你的乖孙女~
继续考好好
拿多多奖
我相信你一定看得到的!

我哭了~

ps:
今天发现原来那么多人疼爱我,有阿公,家人,我的好姐妹们,kor-kor~
我好幸福!
最喜欢被人肯定我是好朋友的时候了~好爱好爱你们啊~
希望快点看完dear PO 在 fb 的video,据说很感动呢~哈!xD
所以就算在这里没有知己也没关系,因为你们给我的爱就足以成为我的后盾,让我继续走下去。
每次想到你们你们,就觉得自己充满力量!
加油~HWAITING!! =D

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

a FUCKING TIRED day~

tonnes of assignents awaiting for me =X
2-3 sets of assignments needed to be submitted on the coming study week!!
chinese-1, basic mathematics on Monday and TMK assignments on Thursday
luckily the deadline of Kemahiran Belajar assignment is postponed,hoorays xD

somehow,I was still rushing for my chinese-1 assignment yesterday night..
finding the background of writing of <西游记-Journey to the West>(What my friend translated it,LoL =P)
We successfully done it and we just realised it was already 12sth AM!!! we had been doing it for a whole night...of course,we chitchat,laughed and ate lots of junkfood on the way completing this DULL project.WE girls had finished half packet of corn-fleaks,half-tupperware of HONEY STARs,1 packet of chipmores and so and so...thx to NGIEW's stomach, my tupperware finally get empty after 2 months filling with the honey stars...LOL (p/s:she is really a eating monster,all of us scared by the ability of her stomach to keep food =X)

finally i was ready to sleep at 1AM Z.z
and......
my friend called me and awaked me because of the stupid fire practise (火警演习) which held at abt 2.30am~I WAS TOTALLY IN BLURRRR~i didnt even hear the alarm!!! my roomate also~so WE poor girls 'escaped' from our room and realised our neighbours had escaped from the FIRE earlier.I wondered why both of us which means 2 pairs of ears didnt hear the alarm and the noise =.="
if it was really a FIRE, i think i had gone to paradise >.<""
thanks god it was JUST a practise~
we gathered at the kawasan lapang and switched to the tapak perhimpunan then. IT WAS 3AM!! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG =O
we are asked to listen to the taklimat given by the ahli bomba on the dark scary 16th of July(in chinese calendar). I was trembling like a leaf and my nose sneezing terribly.The atmosphere was sooooo cold =S
we are finally dismissed at 4AM!! and everybody was like a PANDA @.@
my eyes could hardly open this morning...
OMG
rushing for moral assignment now due to the checking by en. bakir tomorrow...
bye earthlings <3

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

stop emo,cheer up girl!!

i realised that my posts recently are a sad one~
i dont want to be that emo, but i just couldnt control it...
i dont know what's the meaning of my life
i dont know who are the friends i can rely on now
i feel sad most probably is because i have no gang,no my own members here...
i miss the days with my dear friends in secondary school
i miss thc and 10,we used to rumour a lot last time
i belongs to our own NN company^^
i miss the days with min min and wen wen in kmpp too
i miss the days we share our happiness and worries last time~
i belongs to our little 3 girls' group =)
NOW?
i belongs to no one =(
i need a shoulders to cry on
i need ears to listen to my heart

p/s:
-thanks to kor kor,at least i still got u to comfort me and give me advice recently
-thanks to dearest yy~always leave touching comments to cheer me up and encourage me..you're such a sweet girl..do MISS u alot,dear <3
-thanks to nies,chat with me when both of us are free~

thanks to my friends who concern me, maybe i dont know...but due to support from u all,i'll try my BEST to continue wearing my smiley face (fake mask),try my BEST to study hard no matter how tired and lazy i'm..
do hope we meet each others soon in holidays~

Saturday, August 21, 2010

is it a time for me to back to reality?

20/08/2010
my AINO phone had been put into the pocket of my tracksuit
and i had accidentally throw it into the water...
and this stupid silly action made my handphone GONE~
my first thought is :"well, not a big deal! I saved my photo n songs in my pc ady~"
my second thought IS : OMG!!!! MY MSG AND MY CONTACT LIST~~~~~~"
well,i really dont mind my phone~
but i really treasure those msgs...
because the things would never be the same again~
because i would NEVER receive the same msg again...
they're really mean to me
and i always read them again and again when i'm free
and think of my past days
and now?
the only connection and the little secret had gone...
from the first day we know until now, all the things had GONE
speechless,my tears couldnt flow out =X

this is fate.
maybe this is the time i should back to the reality
and no more rely on those virtual msg
but i really SAD
how much i wish i could wake up from this nightmare
how much i wish my msg back
how much i wish for miracle
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sunday, August 15, 2010

早上起床看了《千与千寻》
室友不在,套上耳机,慢慢入戏
开始的时候,觉得好可怕~阴森森的
特别是被千寻的父母变成猪的那一幕吓到了,说不出的震撼!=X
男主角一出场救了千寻,帅呆了!
他默默地帮着千寻~
直到他后来受伤了,真的好可怜~真担心白龙真的会死掉~
后来千寻父母的魔法解开了,可以和父母团聚,回到现实 =D
可是一想到他就得跟白龙分开了~好伤心~心碎 =(
他们记起了一切,他们喜欢着对方,可是。。。
他们俩还会遇见吗在人类的世界?
他们还会记得对方吗再相逢的时候?
唉~爱情~

ps:看戏时被突然进房的朋友连续吓了两次!无言~
带着耳机,谁懂发生什么事嘛~就被无端端地吓倒。。我已经觉得这卡通很可怕了,还在很可怕的时候被吓两次!!天哪~~~
pps:做完了tmk assignment,hope there is nth wrong -/\-
ppps:tired and damn boring!! Z.z

friends~

I felt so happy when my kmpp friends called me just now.
Although I couldnt join them, I feel satisfy to know they enjoy their trip very much~
I was overwhelmed with happiness when I heard their voice and talked a lot with them...I havent be forgotten so far...
I even shed a tear at last because of what they said
I clearly know that I had chosen this way and I have to be determined to continue it.
I really hope that we would meet each other again because I leave when our friendship increasing and I feel so bad to miss out so many great memories of u all~ PLS,GOD! I would like to do anything just to meet them and have fun with them even a short period,PLS~ -/\-

I was adviced by my maktab friend. What she said really wake me up from my silly dream...
'There would never have an everlasting frienship!'
"Nobody is neglecting and memulaukan u,so pls stop being sensitive."
I becoming sadder when heard all this words. They do hurt me. =X
Is it impossible to have everlasting friendship?
I do not believe this statement and I reject to believe it too.
I am still contacting my primary and secondary school friends although it had been more than 6 years we know each other. I do believe that we will continue our friendship in the future.
Dear friends,
prove them that this cruel statement is WRONG!!
A frienship can last long, it is just depends on how the person treats this relationship, sincerely making friends or the opposite.
and...I seriously dont like people treat me cold.
Ya,I am very sensitive and easy to get curious.
I scared being abandoned, perhaps this is because my primary school friends once disliked me and talking bad about me at my back and make me feel not confident, scare of being neglected as well.
Stress to this point, I really feel not confident about myself in studies and physical appearance.
Only when talk about calligraphy, I feel very confident but not to others.

I am really odd...
always harbour a silly dream.
pls prove to me and others, we will be friends forever ^^
although it is just merely one month plus, I sincerely put my love into it.
and...
also to my pri and sec friends, you all had accompanied me for so many incidents and truly understand me, sure I'll grab the free time to hang out with you guys~
distance make the heart grow fonder
LOVE ALL MY FRIENDS I KNOW <3
prove this statement,we will be FRIENDS FOREVER!!
muaksssss....

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

VRY FULL

puasa starts!
and i am eating my maggie mee and mushroom soup for the second days~
it is kinda delicious!!! LOVE THE TASTE~yum yum <3
but back to reality....
it is kinda unhealthy TOO!!
it contains of SO DAMN LOTS of ajinomoto and FATS
but no choice...
i feel lazy to walk to cafe and order food from outside
that's the result by.....
eating UNHEALTHY food~

tomorrow onwards i'll order food and hope wont realised by the block warden
if not, my dinner ll be a BIG PROBLEM!!!>.<
but i should not finish every sets of meal
because
it'll be a BIG burden for my stomach =(

my friend did some salad for us and it is GREAT!!
my dinner today is somehow now considered balance...
FAT,protein,carbohydrate,minerals,fibre,water and vitamin!!
VRY VRY VRY FULL now~
gonna be fat TT TT
O~M~GOSH

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

fed up with some kepo fellow~

i want to express my feeling on fb actually but i scare gt misunderstood by some people...
i want to say that there is always some different between friends and classmates..
we got the right to choose our own friends but unfortunately we are not given the same power to choose our classmates.
a classmate can always turned to be our friend,good friend and even soul mate.
but before this things happen,a classmate is just a classmate.

I wrote wateva thingy in my status is for my friends to know more about my recent life,for MY FRIeNDS to leave their comments,to see how my FrIENDs care about me.Of course,i do need care and love from my friends...but pls pay attention!is MY FRIEnds,not classmates!!!!!!

Saturday, July 31, 2010

when will we all meet again? i miss you all so damn much,u all coz my days suffer =(

不是说时间是最好的药,冲淡一切的过往?
可是为什么?
每当到了一个人宁静的夜晚,
我就会又想起你们
和我种种的回忆
是真得那么难忘
还是自己的执著让我不想放手?
每次一个小小的承诺就能让我充满希望
每次一个小小的关心就能让我倍感窝心
思念是一种病
我真的病得不轻~
哈哈哈

今天见了文和敏~
一样的她们
不一样的一个月
我们又在一起吃东西了
以前每天都会发生的事-〉一起吃,一起笑,一起八卦~
现在变得好珍贵~
似乎带点陌生(我最害怕的事。。。)
他们又要和我越来越远了,说真的我好感伤~
如果我们能一起回那该多好~
心里酸酸的
是妒嫉吧?
妒嫉他们大伙儿又能一起了~
还计划一起到槟城玩!>.<#
而我?
只能一直等待承诺
一直抱着希望
然而希望和期望真的有实现的一天么?
多么担心那时的我们会是陌生人?

又哭了~没用的我TT
我这个人什么都好,就是太重感情了 =X

Sunday, July 18, 2010

最近还好吗?

挑一张耶诞卡写上满满祝福的话
地址写的是心底你能不能收到它
天有点冷风有点大城市宁静而喧哗
这一个冬天我得一个人走回家
问自己习惯了吗
没有你每到夜里回声变得好大
有没有什麽好方法让寂寞更听话
你最近还好吗是不是也在思念里挣扎
你说会记得我还记得吗
你最近还好吗
忙碌吗累吗心还会痛吗
如果真不得已忘了我
快向快乐出发
有再多的牵挂都已没有权利表达
旧情人给的问候比陌生人还尴尬
昨天远了明天还长回忆模糊但巨大
这样的深夜眼泪要怎样不流下
问自己习惯了吗
没有你每到夜里回声变得好大
有没有什麽好方法让寂寞更听话
你最近还好吗是不是也在思念里挣扎
你说会记得我还记得吗
你最近还好吗
忙碌吗累吗心还会痛吗
如果真不得已忘了我
快向快乐出发
你最近还好吗是不是也在思念褃挣扎
你说会记得我还记得吗
你最近还好吗
忙碌吗累吗心还会痛吗
如果真不得已忘了我
快向快乐出发


这首歌的歌词正是我想对你们说的话~
你们最近还好么?

좋은사람 - 박효신 好人 - 朴孝信

준비없이 비를 만난것처럼
就象完全没有准备而遇到的雨一样
아무말 못한채 너를 보낸뒤에
我装成没有任何话语的,在把你送走后
한동안 취한새벽에 잠을 청하며
一段时间里的宿醉的凌晨里,我总是企求着能睡着
너를 그렇게 잊어보려했어
我想就那样把你忘记
시간이 가도
时间渐渐过去
잊혀지지 않는 널
却还是无法被忘记的你
생각하면서 깨달은게 있어
我思考之后终于醒悟

좋은사람
好人
사랑했었다면
如果爱上了的话
헤어져도 슬픈게 아니야
就算分手了也不仅仅只是悲伤
이별이 내게 준것은 곁에 있을때보다
比起在身边的时候,因为这离别是我给的
너를 더욱 사랑하는 맘
我会有着更加爱你的心

셀수 없이 많은 날을 울면서
数不清楚有多少的日子里我哭着
힘든 가슴으로 믿지 않았던 너
怀着如此辛苦的心情,都不能相信已经如此
끝내 날 나쁜남자로 만들었던 널
和你结束而我把自己变成了一个坏男人
어떻게든 미워하려 했어
你该有多么的怨恨我啊
어떤 말로도 미워할수 없는 널
没有说任何话来抱怨我的你
생각하면서 깨달은게 있어
我想着这样的你终于有了醒悟

좋은사람
好人
사랑했었다면
如果爱上了的话
헤어져도 슬픈게 아니야
就算分手了也不仅仅只是悲伤
이별이 내게 준것은 조금멀리 떨어져
这离别是我给的,渐渐地变得有些距离了
너를 헤아릴수 있는 맘
我却会有着更加的记挂着你的心

늦었겠지만 너의 맘 아프게했던
虽然已经晚了,让你的心如此痛苦
바보같던 날 용서해줘
但是还是请你原谅象傻瓜一样的我

단 한번만
就只有一次也好
허락해준다면
能允许的话
나를 믿고 돌아와준다면
请你相信我,能再次回来的话
언제나 말하곤 했던 그런 사람이 되어
不管什么时候我也会象之前说的那样,成为那样的人
너를 지켜주고 싶은데
我很想给予你永远的守护
다시 돌아 올수 없겠니
可是,你不会再回来我身边了吧?

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

生风沫 PAK4 HONG1 BO4
this is what i unfortunately get today...for a whole day!!
anybody know what is this?
nvm...i know it enough~
it had tortured me for a whole day~making my whole body so itchy!!
i kept sctraching on my limb and body but it seemed to be no use but made it spreading somemore~scar leave on my leg =(
i felt so helpless for a while,felt like i m being abandoned here,i couldnt ask for help like what i used to do~nobody can give me the medicine...i had to bear the itchy and pain myself =X
luckily...dad n aunt come bp to give me the medicine
really appreciate what they had done
i love them!
microsoft power point cant be used~omg...i cant do my presentation thingy TT

last but not least
finally end up with sth HAPPY!
i had successfully collected the signatures from ALL the seniors in my hostel block!!!thx godness i m able do finish it in time xD

life is not a bed of roses~~

Saturday, July 10, 2010

很多话想说,很多话不能说也不方便说
活在一个充满spy的环境
似乎一点小错误都会被一览无遗
很多想法和感受收在心底
没有地方能让我宣泄
心情不好
”我的天空今天有点灰,我的心是个落叶的季节。。。”
逼着自己,尝试说服自己
接受一切的一切
强装着笑颜
其实心里。。。。或许不是这样
心里其实很孤单,很寂寞
因为很没有一种归属感
感觉自己不属于任何人
我不喜欢这种被忽略的感觉
从小到大我从来没被忽视过
可是又混不进人群
希望~~~
很快能跟大家打成一片
能跟学姐们打好关系
毕竟她们是seniors.很多事情我们还需要他们的帮助,不想得罪任何人~peace ^^V

加油八~郑净禅!一旦下定目标就从来没有失败过的你。。。
既然下定决心,就要努力蜕变!
变得更勇敢!更有自信!
当一个好孩子,好学生,好学妹,好老师 ^^

梦想是我撑到现在的原因
有了梦想我失去了部分的友情
所以一定要坚持到底
没有失去梦想的本钱了
失去梦想,我就什么都没有了

Monday, July 5, 2010

喜欢不喜欢
情为何物?
为什么有些人有缘无份?有些人无法相爱?
难道世界上没有童话般的happy ending?

世界上最遥远的距离不是天涯海角,而是我在你面前而你不知道我爱你。
好有意思的一句话~

我知道现在说什么都已经太迟了
我已经伤了你
我发现自己嘴巴说的和内心想表达的不一样
我发现我关心你已经超过正常朋友的关心
我发现当你很冷的时候我会不开心
我发现了那些信息时身边飘来酸酸的醋味
我发现我好像很想你,等你给我发信息,哪怕只是个祝福的短讯
我发现以前我在班上从来不会被忽略,因为你会帮我
我发现当你拒绝再说XXX的时候,我会失望,因为在那一刻我觉得很幸福
我发现你开心我也会开心,你不开心我也会emo
我发现absence makes the heart grow fonder

怎么办?
明明知道没有结果,为什么我要这样?
回想着一个没有承诺的话语
想念着一个不知道几时才会见面的人
我很想确定这个奇怪的关系
也很想问你还要我么?还喜欢我么?
你喜欢我,如果我也喜欢你,我们要怎样?
只是你总是要我忘记你
要我就算喜欢你也要停止
我知道你的理性,我何尝不是个理性的人
只是很多孤单的时候,感性是会战胜理性的
我知道你是怕我受伤
或许你知道思念的痛苦所以不要我也这样过
都怪
我们的距离太遥远
我们都还不太了解彼此
我们都还年轻
。。。

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

i HATE orientation

人生中有一次orientation已经很可怜了
可是我的人生中在不到两个月的时间里,经历了两次orientation,还一山比一山高
离开kmpp已经很伤心了
来这里才发现选择离开kmpp是一个错误!
有好几次在学习唱歌,moral session,taklimat的时候,脑海中又浮现了不久前在kmpp迎新州的画面。那仿佛是昨日刚发生的事情一样,如此熟悉和清晰~眼泪又在眼眶中打转 TT
这里的华裔子弟好多,non muslim (chinese,india,bumi from sabah n sarawak) is 2/3 of this latest jun 2010 intake...但我真的好不习惯。我似乎已经习惯了四周都是马来人,我讲什么没人听得动的日子。在这里,感觉四周都有人在监视你,偷听你,毫不自由~我想抱怨些坏话的机会都没有,只好趁夜深人静上来抒发我内心的不满与感伤,真是不吐不快!

感觉上kmpp的老师好好噢!每个都带着笑脸愿意解答我们的问题,可是这里老师看起来都好严肃哦!刚刚唱校歌时,我已经努力地唱出声了,可是老师还是不允许我们坐下~剩的都是‘我们自己人’,看官应该懂我的意思了八?就觉得老师是故意的,故意要整我们。昨天排队就坐时,最后入座的也是华文组的学员,椅子所剩不多,我们拿错椅子的颜色又被念了~很多时候,我都懒得写了,被骂了无数次!!!虽然不是骂我一个人,但这种声音污染不会让你好过的~

kmpp的riadah是播ayumi hamasaki的日文歌,还有girls generation的OH!,超high的学院^^而这,什么都没有!只有在炎热的太阳底下做暖身~热!我腰酸背痛 =X

这里唯一的好处就是allowance高!以后又确保有一个铁饭碗!政府真是太聪明了~收买了许多家长的心~
只能用这堆冠冕堂皇的理由来说服自己继续留下~毕竟我也别无选择了TT
好想好想你们,向几个星期前的现在我在做什么,想你们现在在做什么~天哪,这小孩的相思病病入膏肓拉~哈!!
当个好老师是从小的愿望~好吧,let it be~this is what my life is fated,so i just have to accept the fact and try to adapt to it.Stop critisise here and learn to suit myself into it...
好白话的一篇LoL
还有三天~need to wake up 4am,i better sleep now,bye~

Saturday, June 26, 2010

无精打采

好累好累
头脑好累,因为睡眠不足
心也好累,因为。。。。。
整个人怪怪的
心情很差
不想讲话
在等待开学
因为想逃离
逃离无聊的生活
逃离思念的痛苦
快要疯了
好讨厌醒着的时刻
可不可以一直睡着?
好想大哭大闹发泄
可是有谁会关心?
大家都有自己的事要做
自己的梦要追
而我还是
回到自己一个人
难道孤单是我的宿命。。。
=(
='(
="(
TT . TT

Friday, June 25, 2010

still suffering in my sweet memories

it had been nearly 1 week since i back home
my memories is totally a blank in this week
without friends
without the normal life that i used to have in this whole month
i miss you all
everyday,
the one-month-memories make me happy =)
yet make me sad =(

happy when i think of all of the sweet and memorable days we had in this 1 month which was short
sad when i think of i counldnt join the other memories that you all going to have in the later 9 months
sheding tears in heart TT

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

bACK home

my body is back to Muar
but
my heart and mind are still in KMPP
always think of what my friends are doing right now
they are still carrying out the activities that I used to carry out last time
Last time,I could see them everyday,talking nonsence,sharing interesting incidents that happened around us
Now,I can only see them through a cold screen and hear their voice through phone call
I got no more the same excited feeling when they told me what had happened because I am not there anymore
The more they told me,the sadder I am
because I could only listen to it

I can see people walking around in library through webcam
Last time I could see it myself
Now,whats behind me is just a white cold wall,whats around me is just air
I so miss you all
I am so regret that I didnt appreciate the days I was there with you all
I was just taking it as a norm
I should talk more and laugh more with you all
SO,GUYS
appreciate what u all having now
sometime,something come and something gone
the feeling would never be the same again

ps i miss you ^^

Monday, June 21, 2010

谢谢谢谢

一个月,
一个说长不长,说短不短的时间
一个月,
发生了很多奇妙的事情
认识了很多新朋友
体验了很多感觉

一开始,从排斥渐渐地接受,接受来到这么远这么陌生的城市,接受从出国到回国读书的命运
慢慢地,习惯在kmpp的生活,早上上课中午下课吃饭休息八卦傍晚洗衣冲凉吃饭八卦晚上图书馆嘻嘻哈哈上网
一个月,我才发现我每天的生活是那么地作息正常
突然间,梦醒了
回到了原点
又要回到家里等待新的生活

一开始,只知道jasmine和俐文
jasmine,只知道是个很会说话的美女,不熟
俐文,静到不行的大小姐
一个月后,
jasmine,超级神经,超会讲话的美女
俐文,颠覆印象,也是一讲就不会停的大小姐
我们三个加起来,真的是不曾安静过
每天听着jas的恋爱史,文文的爸爸妈妈,我的烦恼
日子就是这样没有营养的度过
但很开心


一开始,
只认识一个男生,思源
还每次抱怨在这里只有一个男性友人,哈
抱怨他太厉害让我很压力
到后来,认识了他的朋友,那应该是开学一个多星期的事了八
每几天poke出一个新成员
从学友,到浩维,开心,永辉,智亮,到最新的俊龙
p/s:不会一年后全kmpp的华人男生都under你们八?哈哈哈
一个月后,
吓死人,
我竟然在这里认识了整十个华人男生
远远超过了女生的数量
由于我那所谓的距离感,
所以就不太常跟他们说话
其实我觉得自己跟他们并不是很熟
就只是hi-and-bye friends,偶尔开一点玩笑而已
没想到
他们竟然送我礼物!!
还写了一堆信,尤其是永辉的咯,没事字写酱美还写酱好干嘛?
大家真得让我很感动
你们知道么?跟你们道别时的微笑是假的,转过头后,我的泪飙了出来,想到以后可能再也没机会碰面了真的很难过 TT
还我哭得乱七八糟
就只是认识一个月的朋友,还没真正了解对方的朋友
在你要离开前陪你去唱K,还给了一只超级可爱的猴子和小熊,真的是很感动!
我真得很谢谢你们上次陪我找皮包
其实你们可以不特地上来的,但你们没有
真得很感激你们,虽然最后徒劳无功,麻烦了人力,但让我见识到友情的可贵
还要谢谢你们帮我查师训的成绩到这么迟
隔天还得上课的你们~
你们还破费了~买这么大一只猴子一定很贵吧?其实你们没送我礼物真的没关系的
还好有带东西来给你们吃,要不然真的觉得自己欠你们太多了
看到你们都吃得这么开心,我也很心满意足了
明年新年一定要给你们礼物!!希望能来得及给你们~哈!



一开始,觉得caryn是banana,我也参不进yunying,ewen
谁知道不懂几时开始突然感情变得这么好
原来大家都这么好聊!!
更没想到你们也这么舍不得我~
可是才正要混熟的时候却得离开了TT
还有killer没有我想象中的冷~
原来ken会讲话,也很幽默,竟然跳gee给我看~哈!
shu也是好笑咯,一堆pose...
polim一开始感觉上也很冷,后来也是人好好噢!麻坡见啦^^


不能忘了我最亲爱的F4P3
在我一从师训interview回来就问我interview得如何
在我错过了orientation week回来后害怕混不进他们的时候不断和我说话
在我功课没做完的时候借我抄
在每次上课前叫我“老师”叫他们说华语
在我师训成绩出炉时说会舍不得我,叫我不要走
在我不舍得你们的时候,哭得乱七八糟的那个补习班的晚上,坐在我身边陪伴我
在我确定离开时,特地帮我搞了个欢送会
虽然我们相处不久,但与你们的相处,真的让我体会了团结不分宗族的事实
虽然我们宗族文化不一样,但我们相亲相爱就像一家人,我就是你们的小妹妹
有一天,我可能忘了你们的名字,但你们和我相处的每一刻,我是不可能忘记的




还有我的室友
第一次跟马来朋友同住一个屋檐下
整排走廊就只有我一个华人女生
谢谢他们在我不见钱包时主动开口说要借我钱
谢谢他们回乡后带蛇皮果给我吃
谢谢他们总是陪我聊天,讲上一个晚上的话
B1.2.13我会永远记得这个房号的




一个月真的发生了很多事
失去了朋友,也交了新朋友
我真得很希望你们不会忘记我,这个普通平凡的我
我们一辈子都要是好朋友
用一辈子了解对方
一个月太短暂
好多事还没做完
希望你们会记得我!
倘若你们来麻坡玩,请顺便来看看我~
我一定会带你们去走走,虽然麻坡只是个小镇~

除了谢谢,还是谢谢!!!
谢谢你们大家为我所作的一切。。。
谢谢你们的照顾
小女子感激不尽

Friday, June 18, 2010

totally collapse

it was a really sad news that made half of the muarian cry out their heart TT
the sweetest Wee's family had been destroyed by the mishap in Kuantan-Segamat Road...
I was taking tuition with Mr Wee from Form 1 to Form 3,everytime during class he did his best to explain to us.He never been selfish in lending us the Science CD to let us understand better.I remember Mrs Wee always give him a cup of water during class and he once told us that if guys want to get marriage have to find a wife like that,and the whole class burst out laughing!I can barely remember Mr Wee laughing and Mrs Wee shy smile.They were such a sweet couple and the sweetness of the family is shown through the photo around the living room....
But,unfortunately,the scene had gone..........
It is really a cruel fact!We have lost a great teacher!!
Mr Wee called me before to teach me how to further up my studies since i was confuse towards my future and asked for his help,he spoke to me kindly and offered me help if I still had problems.He was such a nice man!responsible teacher!caring father!pious christian! WHY? WHY he was killed in such mishap? It is so unfair for him and his family and for all the students!
Is it because of God is having green eyes towards this happy Wee's family? =(

Jacinth...I miss you too...We havent know each other well and now u had gone...
In my memory,u were really a sweet and shy girl.The first time when you get your hair rebonded,you were shy until you feel reluctant to come out to the tuition class,how shy you are?lolss
you are a gentle and quiet girl too.You seldom talk in class.Even u talked,also in a low volume.I remembered the songs you recommend to me,Good girl turn bad by Fergie.It was really a nice song! You were also a korean singer addict..and also I can remember we exchange tips and giving each other mentally support before SPM...The memories u gave me aint many,but they were all a good one! REST IN PEACE,JACinth,you would never been eliminated in my memory,never and ever...rest in peace under the care of your beloved father God...

Life is so weak,breakable and unpredictable
the previous second,a person alive and talk to you doesnt mean that he ll still be there in the next second.
My hands were trembling and my heart sank when I heard this news from my dear jie jie,I shocked until I couldnt squeeze my tears out.I couldnt focus throughout the whole lecture.I hate myself for being so helpless.I couldnt do anything for them except crying and praying for them... =X
I hope that I can be appreciate everybody I know in my life because we will never know when are we going to lose them...as i said appreciate every moments =)


p/s:Mrs Wee,be STRONG!!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

最快乐的星期三

今天真是个快乐的一天
天空刚被大雨洗涤过
天空蓝蓝的
云朵白白的
好温暖舒服的感觉

koko之后,和朋友们去‘踩’脚车,拍照。。。
出乎我意料的是我竟然豁出去了
竟然挑战我不敢尝试的走单索
可能是太压力而发疯了八~lol
谢谢你们帮我过去,我真得很怕跌下去,那一刻真的觉得很开心
谢谢你哦~
还有老聪,想到要跟你炫耀才会不怕死地走过去,哈 xD
回家就可以大声说话了,lols =P
之后就玩开了,不怕死的我~
今天真是太开心了!!
真羡慕你们以后还有机会一起玩,而我。。。
emo again。。。

hope that u all wont forget me and we got the chance to be together again^^
thank GOD for arranging u all to appear in my life
u all had brighten up my life
appreciate and love you all




Monday, June 14, 2010

曲终人散

为什么人要有缘相遇,却不能永远在一起?
远赴他乡,我是下了多大的决心才甘愿来槟城读书,我适应自己,调整心情,为什么现在又要回去?
离梦想更进一步了
我为什么要拒绝?为什么又止步?
我不懂。。。
自己是真得想当老师,还是回家,还是逃避这里?

我好喜欢这里的人事物,每天都更认识新朋友,新设施
我才刚要开始和新朋友混熟时
就已经来到了最后一个星期
好舍不得
真的

为什么你们要对我这么好?明明知道我不会久留~
为什么我要对这里产生感情?明明知道自己很快就会离开的
为什么为什么?
回去了,我们还会见面吗?
如果一辈子都不能再见了,我会感伤么?
我不知道你们会么?但可以肯定的是,我会!
我会好想好想你们!!!
现在就已经开始想念了~~

倒数计时中。。。。。。。。。。

Friday, June 4, 2010

爱情 vs 友情

友情是平淡的白开水,有点甜甜的
爱情是刺激的咖啡,有点苦苦的

生命里,
不一定需要咖啡才会振奋
有时,
一杯白开水也会暖人心

Monday, May 31, 2010

jz come here to leave comments..lol

didi got exam....good luck to them
and to myself too

miss you all...muakssss ^^

Friday, May 28, 2010

confused

-wesak day-
holiday
at 1st was a lonely day
but now turned to be a cheerful outing day

thanks to wen wen for bringing me out kindly^^
at 1st i thought that i have to stay alone in my room
without any roomates and friends
forced to become bisu =X
luckily,
wen wen kindly jio me out
hehe xP

p/s:
what had happened? i keenly and eagerly know what you want to tell me...
after i leave = u are going to tell me = we are not going to be friends anymore ??
sometime,
curiosity can really kill a cat...
so,
should i looking forward for the day i leave?
it confused me ><

Thursday, May 27, 2010

妈妈,我也要回家。。。

看到大家开心地告诉我:“我有回家!"是那种雀跃,期待的神情
我很不是滋味
心头一阵酸酸的
难道我不想回家吗?
我也很渴望回家,回到那个温暖的地方。。。
室友都回光了
班上朋友也回得7788了
连我的bff也走了
送走他们之后,回到宿舍的路上,看着圆圆的月亮,我又想家了
月亮婆婆是否和我一样,孤单。。。
漆黑的夜空什么也没有
没有点点的繁星
没有绚丽的云彩
只有你孤单地发光
月光下
我的影子是显得多么地寂寞
我也真的好想好想回家

p/s
现在应该就只有讨厌的虫虫陪我
床上都是不知名的小虫子
很恶心勒!!!!!
我不想杀它们,为什么它们一直来?
我手一碰它们就会死掉了也~很可怜
我不想杀生的
可是为什么要自己飞来给我杀?
哎哟。。。。。

又哭了,脆弱的我 TT

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

stupid girl

keep feel that i am the most stupid chinese in kmpp
i am so disappointed on my own performance
every students seemed to be so clever esp the chinese guys that i have known,but why not me?
i really upset!
i dont know who can refer to since i am not yet familiar with my new friends here
i scared being laughed and sooted by them ><
i know malu tanya,sesat jalan
i asked
but i still blurrrrr @@
who can save me from this blur world?
it is a feeling of unsecure and scary to stay here
i feel so lonely in the blur world....

Saturday, May 22, 2010

first study week

it had been a long time since i last used my brain and my brain is now rusting
can it be polished back just by adding some lubricating oil?
i dont think so...
i am so struggling listen to what the lecturer taught and jot down what is being showed in the slide at the same time,and yet i need to focus and understand what are being explained at a lightning speed @@
i m really blur sometimes and now i m trying to suit to the life here and also trying to catch up...
i hope and do believe i can do it!
no more playing and relaxing life,MUST really determined enough to get great result,perhaps 4 flat,lolsss
still,love u all in muar!my loving hometown ^^
and also start to fall in love to everybody i met here,everybody here is kind and friendly enough esp the lecturers,they are all willing to teach us personally
if i am offered teaching course and had to leave kmpp now,i think i ll shed a tear ba,lol xP
but just think of loads of works and the stressful quiz and exam,i still want to leave...
so odd my mind thinking~
anyway,love u all again and i m going to start my hardworking lifestyle....
xD xD xD

Sunday, May 16, 2010

无法停止

想念无法停止
因为思念很长,不能因为一时的分开而让感情断了线
眼泪无法停止
因为思念太长,将想念的思绪化成了水样的珍珠
伤悲无法停止
因为思念好长,会让眼泪在心里荡起惆怅的涟漪

Thursday, May 13, 2010

orientation week in KMPP

after a 7hours journey,finally I reached Pulau Pinang!!! It was a super-damn-so-tired journey! I kept sleeping in the car and doing nothing....lols
i looked so TIRED!!after a good night rest in Hotel Palm Inn,I was heading to Kolej Matrikulasi Pulau Pinang for the registration.I was shocked.The time to register is 8am and I was considered as 'tepat masa' ,but what greeted my eyes was a loooong line of car!I bet there were at least 1000+ cars there =X

then register and get my room key and entered my room and met my hostel and cleaning my place and resting.....................and the NIGHTMARE started!!!!!

afternoon time was ok lar,resting...but then got taklimat at astaka(is field actually~) under the may-penang-damn-hot-sun,a totally-windless condition.
bla

bla

bla
slept at 1something am and started to be homesick TT i admitted that I cried non-stop on my bed,missing my family and friends!somehow,thanks to my dear friends,you all really cheered me up!must always keep in touch o! study hard together due to our future n_n

DAY 2
a brand new day started.I waked up at 4.30 am and washed my clothes.ALAMAK!
then went to dewan xxx to attend majlis perasmian .Here we are,hwee ying and me,both superwomen looked super tired! Z.zlisten to the speech by principal and pengarah sambil sleeping below...we were all too tired!
afternoon time,I met my mentor and knew some new friends!4chinese in my class,1boy and 3 girls but 2 girls are going to switch to sains hayat...omg!!
again~i was late for my moral session and nearly being punished by seniors...time menagement is really important in KMPP!! it is crucial in our life =)
*bear in mind.....3 times late = 1 amaran!!!

DAY 3
another day~also waked up at 4.30 am to take bath!It's great,no need to queue up and waited for my turn as I was early enough =P
gathered at 5.30am for moral session,present our group cheer loud!kaka xD
sambaleh~sambalewa~we are the winners,you are the loser!GROUP 7,brace your weapon,shoot!
we were also having a fun time by enjoying our senior fasilitators' dance~ NOBODY NOBODY BUT YOU xP fasi miao hui,fasi ashlene,fasi sher lan were great but not fasi wei jiet @@
after that,we rushed from bilik kuliah to astaka for a riadah~run there coz too far and we were nearly late again...

walked from hostel to office to bio lab to photostate shop to hostel to bio lab =="""
KMPP really enormous la!these 3 days made my legs luka ady,really painful even though with the scholl shoes ## walk from east to west and west to east everyday,hope that it will make me thinner,hehe^^
really sweat alot!drop...drop...drop
yo!muar,i am back!
thanks god i can escape from the last two days of orientation

Monday, March 29, 2010

just a simple report~

a lot of things encircle in my tinny little brain recently~

family@HOME
fed up to stay at home...Zz...i hate the atmosphere at home,the feeling of stress and unfreedom life at home.It is such a hot place with only the wind produced by the fan.Is it the symbol of being treason? I dont know but I just feel so boring to stay at home and I keen of hangout on the non-working days.....
p/s:I still love my family <3 My heart will always be with you,I am always be your mama's girl ^^ I just like to explore my own world,Dont worry...........

friend@MUAR
I really miss you guys~I look forward every single hangouts with you all,no matter is my primary school friends,secondary school friends or my dear wy~I appreciate every moments we are together because I know the chances are getting lesser and lesser after we enter college or U life...We will be in different school,different states or even different countries...I miss the days we used to be ki-siao-ing together,chatting nonsences and learning and pia-ing together!Believe me,that is really the sweetest and memorable memory in my life^^
p/s:I miss you!! *tears flowing TT*

love@PHONE
erm.....sorry...that is the only thing i can say to u...
i desperate for LOVE!
i desperate for bf <3
but i know it is just a silly small wish...I am not ready yet to enter the complex love world.I am too innocent for it.I am too timid for it.It is a too heavy burden for me.I enjoy the life of loving somebody secretly,admiring handsome guys on the street.I dont know how the life would change with the appearance of a boyfriend..DOes it mean that my eyes could only filled with his look,my nose could only smell his perfume,my mouth could only touch his lips, and my inbox could only be overloaded by the messages he sent??
I dont know...I like what you said,your white-horse-prince havent wake up!maybe that is a truth..I wish for it <3

work@Qdees
I love you all kidssss~your cuteness brighten up my life,your childish acts make my life purer,your naiveness makes my mind simpler without any bad aims...
sometimes we may learn a kid's behaviour,be pure,be naive,be sweet.....to all the passers-by in our life!

caligraphy@LIFE
i am trying to find the feeling back....I believe I can!! =)

I dont mind whether there are anybody reading my blog,I type it just to record it...It will be a wonderful memory in my future...part and parcel will make my life richer!

Friday, February 12, 2010

no more plain life?

i have been so addicted in facebook recently to wait for somebody~~and this makes me lose my enthusiasm in blogging here...my life is not as plain as usual,just because of my laziness~

erm,well...just to inform and type it down as a record of my life...with mr foo yong gang

in he ping bei competition,gold~!

i had won NO1 in sim mow yu nationwide caligraphy competition in year 2009!
and i had been going to jb for 2 weeks to earn some extra pocket money by writing chun lian in the Zon mall~it is a great experience!!!so many people asked for my writing!it is a great satisfaction,it is even prouder than win in a competition^^somehow,i want MONEY $ . $
and i fail my driving test =( which is a bad luck~~omg!dont want recall~~
and i get a new job in Qdees and i am happy there!see the child there?
they 're so cute and happy and so damn energetic!!
i want to back to my childhood too =x

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

it had been a looooooooong time.....

going to blog soon~~just bcz of my laziness~~
a lot of things are waiting to be posted soon...
wait. wait. wait