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Friday, February 26, 2016

My kids.

It has been about one month I'm working here,
teaching this bunch of lovely kids.
Life has never been easy.
Each day, I am facing different circumstances and thinking of the suitable solutions.

I am still very new to teaching world.
The experience during practicum didn't really help much.
'Cuz it is totally different only teaching Chinese and being a class teacher who teaches Chinese.
Sometimes, I felt bad about myself.
I felt sorry for my kids.
I didn't really have enough time to prepare a perfect lesson for them.
I spent most of the time on discussing exercises and spoon-feeding them.
I have no time to actually get to know them, know their background and so on.
I would use some recess time to advice them and counsel them.
And I felt amazing when I saw their behavior get better the next lesson.
But the problem is I don't know how long would the effect stay?

I hope I could have better time management,
not to only teach them,
but also educate them.
That's not easy but that's what I am trying to do now.
I scare I might rotten their discipline recently.
I felt disappointed on myself when I found my scolding and yelling getting more,
and the noise getting louder.
I felt sad when I saw the amount of books that submit to me getting lesser,
and the cross I marked getting more.
I wondered which step I had gone wrong.
I just don't feel like spoon-feeding them 100% before they hand up their exercises to me.
But perhaps my guidance wasn't enough for them to get their work done.
I am still trying different style of teaching.
I am still finding my way.
 To be their best class teacher,
their mom 
and their most reliable person in school.

I really love my class and my kids.
I hope I could change them a better person.
And I'm trying hard.
*Too short, it is hard to find me.*
Photo on Chap-Goh-Meh, the last day of CNY.
We were having a small party in class.
The time was short, the session was quite messy, but it was fun. 
We ate biscuits and we sang CNY songs together.

That's little something that I would like to record down here.
I felt really sweeeeeeeet when my kids called me 'god-mom'.
That's just a joke but I really appreciate them calling me like that. That made our teacher-students relation getting closer.
I felt really touched when they remembered I mentioned that I love fried crab stick and they gave it to me, keep asking me to have one.

最近,
我一直在灌输他们的是,
我不打他们,也不想骂他们,不是因为什么,
而是因为我尊重他们。
我希望他们也会因此而尊重我。
学会“尊重”,感觉会解决很多问题。
互相尊重可以避免班上不同种族而引起的误会。
同理心会让他们学习了解他人,体谅他人。
结论,
我不希望他们因为我凶,害怕我而变乖,
我希望的是,他们因为敬我,爱我而变听话,变好学。

I don't really know what's the point I'm typing this? 
Just some feelings.
Just feel like typing.
I hope there are more sweet things among us happen in my life.
xoxo

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